Russian Blackjack Defection!

[Lawman]

With the recent resumption in Russian bomber patrols, it got me wondering, what would happen if a discontented Russian bomber crew decided to defect? The crew are getting increasingly concerned at the Kremlins hardline policies on free speech, and when they are tasked with doing a fly-by around the British coastline, they see an opportunity. On approaching the British coastline, their Tu-160 Blackjack is intercepted by an RAF Typhoon, operating from RAF Leeming. The Typhoon signals them visually to not enter UK airspace, but the Russian crew instead signal that they wish to land. Not seeing any obvious signs of any inflight emergency, the Typhoon signals home, asking for guidance.

The Typhoon escorts them down the coastline, keeping them just outside British airspace as long as possible. As they pass the eastern coastline of Scotland, they slow, and lower their landing gear, and approach to land at RAF Leuchars in Fife. The Blackjack lands safely, and taxies off the runway, being surrounded by military police, immediately, not sure what to expect. The crew disembark, and state that they wish to defect, seeking political asylum!

The UK government is somewhat bemused by this, not knowing what to do with them. The Russian government is absolutely humiliated, having had one of their most prized bombers now sitting on an RAF base. Russia demands immediate return of not only the aircraft, but the crew, making statements about trying the crew for treason. Instead of immediately ceasing bomber patrols, Russia wants to 'raise the pressure on the UK', so instead, it increases bomber sorties, but puts an FSB officer on board, to prevent the crew from defecting. This was not uncommon practice previously, but had not been felt necessary for many years.

The UK is concerned about the prospect of handing the crew back to Russia, especially given the statements by the Kremlin about wanting the crew dead!

Unfortunately, instead of a simple resolution of the situation, things only get more complicated... With the Russian government showing no trust in their bomber crews, and having targetted the family and friends of the Blackjack's bomber crew, the other pilots become more worried. Having ensured the safety of their families, the crews of a pair of Tupolev Tu-22Ms, and three Tupolev Tu-95s, all decide that the time has come to leave Russia. They tie up the FSB crew member, and depart for UK airspace as well, having contacted the British covertly. The result is a total of six Russian bombers, all sitting on the tarmac at a series of RAF bases.

The Russian government tries to crackdown, and arrests a large number of officers, but this brings condemnation from the Russian people. They are concerned that Putin is trying to use Stalinist tactics, turning Russia down a path its people don't want. The result is a widespread protest against the Russian government, calling for the return of democracy, and the end of the witch-hunts against the military. Certain Russian generals are convinced to join the protest, and refuse to crack down on civilians, especially when ordered to fire on the crowds.

What happens next?

[dragon]

Either MI-6 or the SAS could try to use them for "mischief"
or
The RAF sets up a Free Russian squadron which then does the "mischief" for the British (with the silent American blessing).

[fabe]

Just think of all those bombers in US Aggressor markings
Anyway I don't like this modern version of gunboat-diplomacy, don't Russia's politicians note how dangerous this is and how fast "incidents" can evolve? It somehow reminds me of drunk male teenagers flexing their muscles in order to impress each other...

[BadersBusCompany]

Just had to a quick MS Paint depiction of one in RAF colours. Gonna do a few more in better detail and alternative paint schemes.

[BillSlim]

Based on what we did in the '50s and '60s when presented with Soviet aircraft, we'd probably take them to bits, find out exactly how they work, before putting them back together and returning them to the Russians.
The defecting crews would be fully debriefed and given asylum under new identities and warned not to drink any tea that glows in the dark.    

[Lawman]

What I would love would be for the UK to put it back together, but miss out a few bits... As the Russian crew arrives here to fly it back, they get around six miles offshore, and then get picked up by a friendly waiting Sea King...

Alternatively, do what China did with the EP-3, and simply take it entirely to bits, and FedEx it back, piece by piece...

[Lord Darth Beavis]

Yes!  Send it back Fedex...POSTAGE DUE!!!   Second cold war over due to bankrupting the Kremlin!  

[Lawman]

Actually, given the Russian's newfound 'wealth', demanding respect as the rightful descendandts of the Soviet Union, perhaps it is time to stop giving Russia special treatment. The first step would be to remove Russia from the G8, since it doesn't belong there (not being one of the eight strongest economies). This would give them a major setback politically, and in particular, would force them to want to play ball, or sit out in the cold. Switching to more bilateral talks, nations in the west can freeze Russia out, making life very difficult for Putin.