Create your own Motivational Poster

[Go4fun]

You asked for it Hobbes.
I had a room mate in the barracks while in the Army in Garlstadt FRG. He was taking correspondence course to further his career in the Army and afterward and used a ton of pencils and scratch pads. He got sick of manually sharpening pencils and bought a electric pencil sharpener from the PX. When he realized the  American plug would not fit a German outlet he asked me for advice. I told him he needed an inverter from German 220 to American 110 voltage. So naturally he cheaped out and bought a converter plug. I told him it wouldn't work but he plugged it in anyway. He sharpened a pencil, In half a second he had a pencil you could stick into a cinder block wall like a dart! Very sharp.
So one night I am laying on my bunk reading a magazine or book and he is studying hard. He is sitting there thinking and rolling the pencil end for end. Then he starts staring at the eraser end. I could hear the gears grinding across the room. Finally he gets it graphite end up and slowly lowered the eraser into the pencil sharpener. The sharpener goes to Warp 3 until it bites the metal holding the eraser.
Then the sharpener pulled the pencil from his grip and proceeded to dance, smoke and throw sparks across the desk. Private Dumjohn reaches down and pulls the cord from the wall and lifts the mess from the desk until he realized the overheated cord was melting to his hand. He then starts twirling the sharpener overhead like a lasso and screaming then hurls the thing over me and out the (Thankfully open) bay windows.
He then runs into the bathroom and turns the cold water tap on full blast and sticks his hand under it.
The Charge of Quarters comes running in and asks me what all the screaming is about. I can't answer. I have fallen off the bed with laughter.

[RussC]

 

Thing of beauty. Reminds me of something out of the old "Home Improvement" TV show and Tim (more power to it!) Allen. The first man to ride a jet tractor lawnmower.

[Go4fun]

It was even funnier when I was telling the guys at the Recreation Center about it and they were calling Bovine Excretment on it. One guy pulled out a bible, set it on the table with his left hand on it and raised his right hand. "I swear what he says is true. I watched it out my window. And I saw the guy hang out the window and scream "Curse you demon pencil sharpener'! I speak nothing but truth". He happened to be ina billet that was back to back with ours.

[NARSES2]

 

And he was studying to farther his career ? 

[PR19_Kit]

When I first started work for my last employer back in 1978 my then Boss was based in our Berlin office, but he was a hard-over Minnesotan who believed that the world ended once you'd got east of Maine. He shipped all his US built stuff to Berlin and 'converted' them to the German 230V electrical system by removing the American plugs and replacing them with Shucos........

Needless to the say the results were spectacular, especially the big TV that he brought into the office with him as he just HAD to have his daily dose of the US Forces network. He plugged it in, switched it on and leant back to watch and there was a HUGE bang and the back of the set flew off, followed by large chunks of transformer and exploded capacitors etc. He looked askance at the wreckage and said 'Goddamit, the same thing happened to the one I've got in my apartment!' 

It wouldn't be so funny except he was an electrical engineer!!!!

[Martin H]

Ive heard similar stories from Mildenhall from the early 1990's.

Apparently it became so common, that the next lot of married quarters built out side the base at Beck Row had dual UK and US ring mains built into them.

[pyro-manic]

And these people are left alone with weaponry?

[Go4fun]

And these people are left alone with weaponry?

It is a scarey thought, isn't it? 

[rickshaw]

And these people are left alone with weaponry?

We had an old saying.  "Whats the difference between the Boy Scouts and the Army?  Adult supervision." 

Too true at times.  I've known some soldiers who should never have been allowed out of the house let alone to use firearms.  I never could figure out how they got past Kapooka. 

[RussC]

And these people are left alone with weaponry?

And allowed to reproduce.

[Go4fun]

What Scared me worse was the Second Lieutenants that were allowed to lead these DumbJohns. I had a list of the officers who would get hand grenades with smoke grenade fuses.

[Go4fun]

I decided my WhIf writings deserved a nice title and what's a title without an image? So now I can look at my image and see what I'm writing about.

And no, they aren't using tractors in battle...
...YET!  

[Martin H]

What Scared me worse was the Second Lieutenants that were allowed to lead these DumbJohns. I had a list of the officers who would get hand grenades with smoke grenade fuses.

When I was still a range officer with the Air cadets, while on the range at Colchester. A territorial army Sargent Major (from our local REME unit) told me in no uncertain terms that there are two things you should never give an officer under any circumstances.

1. A weapon.

2. A map.

For the non brits. REME = The Royal Electrical & Mechanical Engineers.

[Aircav]

You missed off the third thing Martin, a Compass. 

[Go4fun]

Definately Air Cav. A officer with a weapon, a map and a compass makes any soldiers' blood run cold.